


A Less Profound Bond

by relucant



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Coda, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Episode: s11e09 O Brother Where Art Thou, First Kiss, Lucifer's Cage, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-11
Updated: 2015-12-11
Packaged: 2018-05-06 03:06:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5400713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/relucant/pseuds/relucant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"She kissed me," he blurts suddenly, without meaning to.</p>
<p>Cas freezes, hand on the doorknob.  When he turns back, the anger on his face is gone, replaced by a terrible sadness.</p>
<p>"What?"</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Less Profound Bond

**Author's Note:**

> codas are really, really not my strong point, y'all. but I couldn't help trying to fix it a little bit.

"I still don't understand why you refused my help," Cas says, leaning against the counter with his arms folded.

Dean sighs, pressing his hands to his eyes. He'd gotten back to the bunker the day before, alone and numb, and since then he's had a pissed-off angel to deal with on top of everything else.

"I am, after all, the only entity to have broken _into_ the Cage, a fact which seems somewhat relevant to our situation. It would have been easier to save Sam from the Cage _before_ he got locked into it with the Devil himself."

"Look, Cas. Amara's strong, stronger than Lucifer, and you're not even fully healed up yet. So you just --"

Cas' face darkens even further. "I realize I'm useless to you without my full strength, but I still could have helped."

"You ain't _useless_ , Cas. Ever. It's just -- it's complicated."

Cas studies him, eyes narrowed, then straightens up with a sigh. "I'll return to my Netflix, since that's apparently all I'm good for. Call me if you _need_ me," he calls pointedly over his shoulder. "I suppose I should be grateful you're allowing me to stay at all."

Dean flinches. He knows he deserves it, but the memory of what he did to Cas when he fell still aches like a raw wound.

"She kissed me," he blurts suddenly, without meaning to.

Cas freezes, hand on the doorknob. When he turns back, the anger on his face is gone, replaced by a terrible sadness.

"What?"

"She kissed me," Dean repeats, a flush creeping onto his face. "When I found her. And she brought me back to her weird little stomping grounds."

"So that's why you didn't want me along," Cas says. "So I wouldn't be... in the way."

"What? No, dude, that's not -- look. She, uh, she tried to eat my soul. And when she couldn't, she -- she kissed me."

"Why are you telling me this?" Cas says slowly.

"She keeps goin' on and on about this -- this connection we share. Sound familiar?" He tilts his chin to his bicep, where the memory of the faded brand still burns.

"The bond we share. From when I found you in hell and pieced you back together."

"I -- yeah. An' she's got a weird effect on me, no denyin' it -- I go all kinda blank and empty around her. But I keep comin' back to wondering if she can't take my soul because -- because _you've_ already claimed it."

"So that's why you need me alive," Cas says. "So she can't get to you."

" _No_ , Cas! I mean, yeah, obviously, but you're missin' the point. I need _you_ , actual and whole. Safe."

Cas stares at him in honest confusion. "As long as we stop the Darkness and save your brother, what does it matter if I'm _safe_?"

"Because I love you, you fuckin' dumbass," Dean yells, hot tears pricking at his eyes.

There's a heavy silence, then the sound of footfalls over linoleum. "You're crying," Cas says wonderingly. He swipes a thumb over Dean's cheek, and Dean chokes out a laugh.

"Yeah, well, been a rough couple days." He turns away, scrubbing roughly at his eyes. "Look, man, I'm sorry. You got enough to deal with, last thing you need is a sorry love confession from a fucked-up human. I just -- I've seen Amara kill angels like it's _nothing_. And if she knows you're what's standing in between her and me, she'll burn you up in a second. I can't let that happen to you, Cas. I won't."

He keeps his eyes closed, waiting for the telltale slam of a door, but instead there are two strong hands gripping the sides of his face.

"She can't have you," Cas growls into his ear, and Dean's heart jumps. "You're _mine_."

Dean barely has time to register the words before he's getting kissed so hard his knees go weak.

"Mine, mine," Cas repeats in a litany against Dean's lips. "She has no claim on you."

Dean chokes out an embarrassing whimper, wrapping his arms around Cas' neck.

"Tell me," Cas whispers when they finally break for air. "Tell me, Dean. Please."

"Yours," Dean pants. "Always yours. Shit, Cas, 'm so sorry it took me so long to wake up."

Cas just shakes his head. "I never thought I'd get to have this, and I'd made my peace with it long ago." He drops his head to Dean's shoulder, and Dean breathes in the scent of him, clean and cool like rain.

"Cas," Dean begins, tightening his fingers on Cas' skin, "I --"

"No, Dean," Cas interrupts gently, and Dean flinches like he's been shocked.

"No? You -- you don't want --"

"I can't promise what you're asking for."

"I didn't -- I didn't ask you to promise anything, man, I thought you wanted this…"

"More than anything in this world, or any other." Cas reaches out, pulls him back in. "But I can't promise to stay out of your fights. Even if they put me in her path, which they will. I won't let you stop me."

A muscle twitches in Dean's jaw, and then he lets out a sigh. "Yeah. I know. Wish to hell I could, but I can't do it alone anymore."

"No," Cas agrees. "You can't."

"But, dude." Dean takes a deep breath. "Think we could -- y'know -- compromise?"

Cas tilts his head, and something unravels in Dean's stomach at the familiar gesture.

"I'll, y'know, keep you in the loop. Honest. No more shovin' you back into Sam's room with the Netflix. But you gotta believe me if I tell you shit's under control, least 'til you get yourself all feathered up again."

Cas raises a dubious eyebrow, and Dean snorts. "I -- I don't think she can kill me, man," he admits, exhaustion finally cracking in his voice. "And I know I can't kill her." His shoulders slump, and he drops his head into Cas' neck. "Sammy's in the Cage again -- because of _me_ again -- but Luci ain't gonna kill 'em, not when he needs him. We got a limited time before shit really starts to go down -- promise me you won't throw yourself in the fire before you gotta."

Cas sighs. He tilts Dean's head up with a finger under his chin, until their foreheads press together. "For you, Dean," he whispers, kissing him again. "Always."

**Author's Note:**

> find me on [tumblr](http://relucant.tumblr.com) or [twitter](http://twitter.com/relucanting).
> 
> I'm nice.


End file.
